No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Randomize
