yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
