He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Randomize
