I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize