i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
