there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
