There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
