Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
