Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Randomize
