Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
