i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
