fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
