her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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