Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Randomize
