For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Randomize
