Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
