I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
I hope mine doesn't look like that
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Randomize
