these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
