I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
