She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
Randomize