I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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