Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Randomize
