come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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