Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
