i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Randomize
