You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Randomize
