I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
sex in a hospital.. check
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
