he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
