I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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