She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
