Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Randomize
