Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I have fence marks all over my body
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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