I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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