Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Of course I have a pirate flag
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
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