Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Randomize