how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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