If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
I look excited, but its just a facade.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
