Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
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