My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
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