I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
