I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
