Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
