He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
