the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
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