Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Randomize
