Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
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