i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
