do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
It's never too late to be topless.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
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