You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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