My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
